By Elliott Brack
Editor and Publisher, GwinnettForum
APRIL 12, 2022 | We want to yell out to everyone for them to think as we ask: “Hey! What happened to civility?”
Have you recognized how we have become so downright mean and uncouth in our relationships to people who don’t agree with us?
Will our country ever be able to return to the time when people got along with one another?
Some of this has to do with the growing lack of manners. We’ve noticed the social scene unravel over our lifetime. So many people are downright discourteous to one another.
Part of this must go back to the downfall of family life. We certainly don’t see families gathering around the table on a regular basis not only to have a good meal, but to catch up everyone on their day, and delve into deep discussions. Oh, what a fine time that was!
Americans often don’t have regular meals any more. Maybe that’s because of the growing element of fast foods in our lives. McDonald’s, Kentucky Fried and the others are certainly evidence of that.
When we talk of the lack of civility, we mean the way people deal with one another. It’s often not kind, not courteous, and not with normal reason. And it is almost always rude.
What we ought to be doing is to treat each other as if we were talking with one of our parents. But these days children are not always showing respect for their parents. (Sometimes it’s because the parents are being rude and disrespectful to their children.)
Meanwhile, what this lack of civility can do is erupt in harshness, in outright meanness, and too often, in violence, including brandishing of weapons, and sometimes shooting. What have our people become?
There’s another element. As our nation has become more urban, we often do not know each other as people do who live in smaller communities. And when you do not know your neighbor, you are liable to be more suspicious and distrustful of him, and he of you. Add in a fence line, or a dog or cat, or a baseball going into another yard, and you may have the beginning of trouble.
All this is a far cry from the Biblical training of loving your neighbor as yourself.
Understand, we’re not thinking of incivility to people in foreign lands. We’re talking about what we see as happening to those who live around us, your neighbors. And watch out if you get into a discussion. Bringing in an attempt to discuss politics or religion won’t help matters.
Most recently, in of all things, a confirmation hearing for a justice on our Supreme Court, saw unmitigated lack of civility toward a potential candidate for that office. Several senators acted most discourteous in framing their questions. Their snarly attitude in attacking a respected candidate was a discredit to themselves. For many people, those attackers were in reality tarnishing their own reputation with their lack of courtesy, with their anger and manner.
At age 16, George Washington wrote out (or copied) 110 rules for civility. Go back and read these many rules, and you get a flavor of what life was like then. His first one says a lot: “Every action done in company ought to be with some sign of respect, to those that are present.” We surely don’t see that today.
George Washington would not be proud of the way many Americans are interacting these days.
Our prayer for our country would be for us to return to a more civil society to benefit us all.
- Have a comment? Send to: elliott@brack.net
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