By Debbie Houston, contributing columnist | Mary Lou and I became friends about six years ago. We’re two different people, to be sure. She is Unitarian and I am Baptist. She voted for Bernie Sanders in the Georgia primary; I voted for Marco Rubio.
When we discuss politics or religion, we go gentle into the conversation to maintain our friendship. In the beginning, we spoke about a common interest—genealogy–and from that she urged me to join the National Society of the Daughters of the American Revolution. Before a woman can join, she must prove she has a Patriot ancestor. The DAR has resources to help women identify their ancestor and gather the all-important documentation.
I never dreamed that such an esteemed organization would welcome me, but it did, and I’m thankful. Through DAR, Mary Lou and I worked together on another shared interest — literacy. And from there, I began teaching English as a Second Language at my church. Do you see where this is headed? One interest led to another and a new acquaintance had broadened my world.
It isn’t all work. Mary Lou and I walk at Lilburn Park for exercise, fresh air, and good conversation. She says she has learned from me and I told her I have learned from her. For example, she said Christians speak in a kind of code that others often don’t understand. That opened my eyes. It reminded me of growing up in my church; whenever the preacher mentioned the “Holy Ghost,” I trembled. Ghosts of any sort frightened me. And yet some of us Christians assume everyone understands the doxology of our faith.
Mary Lou and I recently discussed President Obama. She said Republicans stood in his way at every turn. I said, well, that’s always true of the opposing party. But then she reminded me of Republican Senator McConnell’s words in 2010 that, “The single most important thing we want to achieve is for President Obama to be a one-term president.
I wish McConnell hadn’t said that; I had to concede Mary Lou had a point. When one of us can’t concede, we often agree to disagree.
I’m bothered by the modern litmus test for making friends, that people must think alike. How did we get to this point? I think it’s from politicizing everything, including friendship. “I don’t like that celebrity,” a conservative writes on Facebook. “He’s very liberal.”
Americans have more in common than we admit. We care about our families, the economy, and the right to pursue happiness. The latter I stole from Thomas Jefferson — who was not a Christian. He enjoyed the Bible, but cut out all references to miracles. I think we still could’ve been friends and maybe gone on long walks together.
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